You know God send messengers to bring back Love into your life. With Tom's birth came the start of my healing. When I looked intro those eyes for the first time, it hit me. This tiny bundle just out of his mothers womb was in my hands drawing his first breaths of life.
I swore that he would not know the pain that I did. If he wanted something, he got it. Big mistake I know know but I delighted in doing it. These poems are for my son Tom...
The voyage to my Brave New World is now underway,
But I'd not properly reckoned with the price I must pay,
As my New World grows closer so my old World grows dark,
The great pyre of freedom is now just a few dying sparks.
In this dark world I left my beautiful young son,
In the care of my soon to be ex-wife: his Mum,
He must learn a hard lesson to serve for all time,
When money overcomes love, there are few darker crimes.
What good is money and a house made from gold,
When you ignore your heart, the spark from your soul,
For what money can buy can be stolen by another,
Who will come in the guise of a friend or blood brother.
He must learn of the things that money can't buy,
He must know that a thieves words will always be lies,
I must show him his young heart truly has wings,
But as he's learning to fly, it's a painful thing.
I must teach him his heart has its own eyes and ears,
And perceives everything his brain sees and hears,
I must teach him by listening to both mind and heart,
Will show him the way when life's path can grow dark.
At the point when he's alone and lost for the first time,
When there's no money to count or friends to mind,
Now comes the time for the true test of his soul,
As he stares into his life's bottomless, black hole.
In the true World that's grown bitterly cold and dark,
He'll hear the quiet whispers and the light from his heart,
And from these small whispers and light that he sees,
Will come his salvation as his young heart is set free.
He'll realise what seemed the end was just a fresh start,
But this time his companion will be his freed heart,
He'll learn the balance between heart and mind,
In a new World flooded in warm, bright sunshine.
In his new World liars and thieves run for the dark,
As the masks that they wear are their own long dead hearts,
Here lies and deceit simply show there true worth,
As dark shadows from a time before his rebirth.
Of all God's gifts it's been my blessing to see,
The greatest is the son he placed in care with me,
With that wonder treasure that floated down from above,
Finally came my reaquaintance with the innocence of Love.
NO!!! - I will not leave him in this dark place,
When all I can see are tears running down his young face,
The time has now come for me to turnaround,
Away from the Brave New World I had just found.
When the night finally ends on a shared life passed away,
Will come the dawn of a bright, sunny new day,
The beauty and wonders of this New World I'll share,
With the son I left in his Mother's nightmare.
What happened between his parents was one of life's crimes,
But his tears will dry and wounds heal with the passing of time,
Of one thing he can count on in the new age to come,
Is the love that always he'll have from Dad and Mum.
copyright: Alan Graham 2002 - 2012
For such a long time I lived in the dark,
Awaiting the arrival of some divine spark,
To wipe away the pain and misery I'd seen,
To make what had happened - a never been.
The night the spark arrived, I never knew,
It would come into my arms in the shape of you,
A small, purple screaming bundle with a bumpy head,
Bringing back to life what I once thought as dead.
As I held you in my arms and looked down in your face,
I saw the beauty in your heart and my rise back to grace,
In that instant a great light shone into my dark,
From the bundle I held and the innocence in your heart.
In that moment I swore as I held you in my arms,
That I'd keep you protected and safe from harm,
I'd buy you everything that I never had,
I'd show you the man that's proud he's your dad.
Now that time's past as you grow into a young man,
And I must watch from a distance as you learn your life's plan,
I'll always be here for you and when you want by your side,
As I watch in awe in what God provides.
For with your birth came the saving of me,
From a time past of great pain and dark misery,
I see every day the trust and love in your eyes,
And the pain that you bravely try to disguise.
I love you my Son and you will have your time,
To bask in the glory of your own sunshine,
As the Son saved the Father now the circle's nearly done,
For the Father sees the special man that you will become.
copyright: Alan Graham 2002 - 2012